Customer Care in 2012

Operator : Thank you for calling Shanti Sagar Fast Food. May I have your

Customer: Helloo, can I order..

Operator : Can I have your multi purpose card number first, Sir?

Customer: Its aah, hold on 889861356102049998- 45-54610

Operator : OK youre Mr Singh and youre calling from 1715B, 18th Cross Malleswaram. Your home number is 23440946, your office 56452302 and your mobile is 9823426625. You are now calling from your mobile now, Sir?

Customer: How did you get all my phone numbers?

Operator : We are connected to the system Sir

Customer: May I order your Seafood Pizza.

Operator : Thats not a good idea Sir

Customer: How come?

Operator : According to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level Sir

Customer: What? What do you recommend then?

Operator : Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. Youll like it

Customer: How do you know for sure?

Operator : You borrowed a book entitled Popular Hokkien Dishes from the National Library last week Sir

Customer: OK I give up Give me three family size ones then, how much will that cost?

Operator : That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The total is Rs 999.99

Customer: Can I pay by credit card?

Operator : Im afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card is over the limit and you owe your bank Rs 39,720.55 since October last year. Thats not including the late payment charges on your housing loan, Sir.

Customer: I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdraw some cash before your guy arrives

Operator : You cant Sir. Based on the records, youve reached your daily limit on machine withdrawal today

Customer: Never mind just send the pizzas, Ill have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?

Operator : About 45 minutes Sir, but if you cant wait you can always come and collect it on your scooter

Customer: What!

Operator : According to the details in system ,you own a Scooter,registratio n number KA 04 X 1123

Customer: ????

Operator : Is there anything else Sir?

Customer: Nothing by the way arent you giving me that 3 free bottles of cola as advertised?

Operator : We normally would Sir, but based on your records youre also diabetic.

Customer: #$$^%&$@$% ^

Operator : Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 15th July 1997 you were convicted of using abusive language on a policeman?

Customer: [Faints]